SIRO-1707 Amateur Personal Filming, Submission. 510

About this work

I tried appearing in AV. That in itself is neither more nor less than that. Whether I can tell people or not is pretty irrelevant. First of all, other people's eyes really don't matter. People around me are noisy. They're always noisy. I'm not causing trouble, so I want them to leave me alone. Everyone has been like that since before. My parents at least told me to graduate high school, so I somehow finished, but the teachers who fuss over me about everything are annoying, and I couldn't keep up with the irritating, cutesy vibe of girls my age and felt uncomfortable. I kept thinking how much easier it would be to just work part-time and tried to quit many times. I probably stood out in class. If asked why I'm alive, I'd answer "for self-realization," and if asked "what kind of person are you?" my occupation is part-time work and I'm not a student, so I don't have the "title" people use to easily measure others. What I want to say is that I live naturally as myself. I live each day honoring my sensibility so I don't lose what I think, what I want to convey, or what I want to say. No matter how much those stupid adults — who have passively and absurdly turned “being involved in society” from a means into an end — regard me as an oddball and look down on me, my identity doesn't exist where they're looking, so I feel nothing. So please stop nagging and leave me alone.